Wednesday, December 16, 2009

~Awal Muharram~

I decided to take a break from all these Hajj posts, and dedicate my 50th post (or 46th, if excluding those other posts) on the start of the new Hijriah Year!

Now that 2009 is nearly lowering its curtain to make way for 2010, and 1430 will end in a couple of hours, I thought I’d make a post about wish lists and whatnot.

And so…here it is.

I wish…
>Everyone’s deep wishes would come true. Especially my family and friends. Because you know, you thought you wanted this, but deep in your heart, you actually wanted something else. I asked a couple of them of what they want, and they want this and that, but then I thought, I should just pray that their deepest wishes would come true. That is all.
>I can speak Arabic fluently, like a native, if that’s possible.
>I have better health.
>I have better opportunities.
>My inspiration won’t ever, ever dry down.
>Someone to read my work.
>The courage to ask someone to read my work.
>Would you read my work? No. Forget it.
>Things won’t change for the worse.

I kind of wish…
>I have a Coach Poppy bag.
>And a pair of Coach Poppy flats.
>Chanel stuff.
>L’occitane stuff.
>Benefit stuff?
>I’m being materialistic. But I really want a new bag.
>I don’t know. I need to think. Hmm.
>Oh yeah! I wish I have Harry Potter books in Arabic. :D

I will update this post once I’ve thought it through. lol


I was clearing my HDD the other day.

And I somehow stumbled across an old YM conference.

The conference brought back fond memories, something that used to curl my lips upwards for weeks.

We were goofing around, role-playing instead of merely chitchatting. I remembered how my mother used to yell at me for continuously YM-ing and didn’t do anything productive.

I suppose that was why I left the whole community.

Duchess, the one who always stood by the Queen’s side, even though her Duke husband cheated her off or something to that extend.
Princess, and her rebellious nature of running away with her true love instead of marrying the prince that the Queen had chosen.
Maid, the one who took care of the royal family loyally, despite how her beloved footman lived in the other kingdom.
Bear, who stood by the Princess, no matter how rebellious she was, and stood by the Queen, no matter how forgetful she was.

And of course, the kings, the duke, the princes, the footmen, and all those imaginary characters…

The Queen (me) truly miss all of you! (yes, including those imaginary ones)

And recently, I came across a thread in a forum, mentioning my username…

They asked if anyone knows where I am right now.

No one really knows, of course.

I still remember, after leaving the land of forgetfulness (how contradictory…), I used to jump into the mm wagon and spend my entire day doing nothing but mere chitchatting.

Until I realized how such activity seems to lack productivity, so I decided to leave them altogether.

I know how terrible I am, but leaving discreetly is undeniably better than announcing your departure.

Because that way, I wouldn’t keep visiting them again, reading their replies on my goodbye letter.

At least this way, I can forever forget them, and they will do so with me.

As they say.

Internet is a place where cowards could roam free.

And cowards include me, I guess.

From the bottom of my heart…

I’m sorry. m(_ _)m

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