Friday, July 17, 2009

The act of giving...

The abnormality of my life couldn’t be hidden, not to the public’s eyes. I’m not craving for attention, but that’s solely what I get whenever my life’s story began to unroll before my very eyes. They asked questions, I answered nonchalantly. They questioned my sincerity, I shrugged it off. They complimented my patience, I gave a silent smile. But when they questioned for my lack of complain, I really am at the speechless bay...

What is there to complain? I couldn’t possibly complain. This life is more than I deserved. Not fabulous for sure, but not too shabby. My life was envied, but wait until they see what lies beyond the phony smile. I’m sure they will cower and never think of exchanging lives again. Better be poorer than richer, saner than freakier.

I happened to like the latter, truthfully.

That is why when you are given three grand for a simple job, you admit it right away. Who cares if others' life is in jeopardy? At least your life, and family of course, would be better. The reason for increased robbery, thievery, other criminal is tough nowadays. Especially with the economic recession...too many people were fired from their jobs, rejected from various interviews, how on earth are you going to support your family? You can’t possibly sell dirt for money. Or maybe you can. To the right person, of course.

That being said, the thing that irked me the most is how some people took the help for granted. They asked for help, sure we help. They asked for money, here have some. They promised to pay it back, no we don’t really mind. They have no money, we don’t say a thing. They ran away, without informing us. Uh...okay. We saw them, they ran away.

Freakish hell that pissed us off. Its not as if we gave them such terrible vibe, its not as if we threatened them that we will kill you off if you didn’t pay. We are not loan-sharks -.-

If you really have no money to pay, at least say that in front of our faces. We have known each other for months, you should know by now that we are nothing but cruel, no harm at all. Sure, you might be embarrassed for breaking your promise, but you are proving to be such a coward for running away from these people that went through hell to make sure your family is well fed.

We don’t mind helping others in pain, we understand your suffering. It’s not as if we couldn’t live if we lost a couple of bucks. Donation, from the bottom of our heart. If a couple of bucks could make the difference, then we hope that the difference could change their lives, even by a miniscule amount.

I used to help others in distress, hoping for no payment whatsoever. Tough work, but I endured it all. In the end, after all those months, all those hours, five days a week, mountains of tensions, sickly condition, I only got a couple of bucks. But I don’t complain, maybe a little, because some of them are not that poor, some of them are richer than me, yet they kept quiet...but I understand. I did this purely for the sake of the children. Nothing but mere help.

I must say now the hard work is paying off. I could finally taste the part of the life's enjoyment that people raved about, I have the chance of exploring a new world that I could possibly never see...what more could I ask for?

Masha Allah. Thank you Ya Allah.

If only others could realize that money is not everything and doesn’t end up being too stingy.

Richer than us but begged for sympathy and money.

Their money is securely kept in their banks so they need to use our money instead. And paying back...hmm...not promising anything.


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